When I told my wife this post might ruffle some feathers, she rolled her eyes at me and went back to whatever she was doing, which was probably the right reaction. She’s used to me ruffling feathers, after over twenty years together that’s not new. What is new is my willingness to speak openly about something chiropractors have been complaining about amongst ourselves for years – other chiropractors. Specifically, the crappy ones who can’t adjust their way out of a paper bag.
I decided to speak up because I’m all too aware that before someone even steps foot in my office, I’m being judged by your experience with a previous chiropractor. Or, if you’ve never been to a chiropractor, I’m being judged by your best friend’s sister in law’s experience with a chiropractor who had her lay under a pyramid to align her chakras while they gave her an ever-so-gentle adjustment that she didn’t feel while kumbaya played in the background. Mmmhmm. Didn’t even feel? Some might refer to that as “not an adjustment.” But I’m getting ahead of myself…
Usually I just smile and nod when someone tells me a story like that, and try to be as polite as I can when I explain that is not exactly what I do. But today I’m going to ask the question all chiropractic patients should be asking:
“If your chiropractor isn’t moving your joints, what the hell are you paying for?”
The heart of any chiropractic visit is the adjustment, specifically—using the hands to move the joints of the spine. Seems pretty basic enough, but there’s one problem.
Some chiropractors are terrible at it.
There. I said it. And no, I won’t name names or start pointing to specific offices. But I will tell you that after twenty years in this profession, there are definitely those who are great at it and those who, well, are not.
Think I’d be celebrating the lack of great adjusters out there? Dancing for joy that competition — or at least quality competition — is so sparse? You’d be wrong. Every time someone gets a lackluster adjustment it will yield lackluster results, which is horrible for the profession overall. Hence, bad for me because now I’m being judged by that person’s lack of skill. The truth is this — no matter what special technology your chiropractor uses, no matter what relaxing aromatherapy is wafting through the office, or the great coffee in the waiting room, or how awesome the roller table is that you look forward to using every week — it doesn’t mean a hill of beans when the chiropractor isn’t good with his/her hands.
A chiropractor that can’t give you a good adjustment with their hands isn’t someone I would pay my money to see. And neither should you, because great adjusters are out there. Just like with other professional services, you might have to try a few people out before you find the right fit. And to be perfectly clear, when I say great adjuster I’m talking hands directly on you, not using some special “instrument” to move joints. There is no instrument that can move joints like a practiced set of hands, and if your chiropractor is relying on one of these tools, I’m going to tell you—that’s not a reassuring sign.
It doesn’t matter if you’re a large muscular man, a good chiropractor will be able to get the job done. It may be more difficult than with an average person, but they will have the skill to move that spine. It also doesn’t matter if you’re elderly or young. A good chiropractor can use those same hands they just used to adjust a giant to gently move the joints of their most fragile patients. It won’t take a special device. The hot packs, the stim, the flexion distraction tables are all great, and they do help relax the muscles to provide relief, but they’re the icing on the cake. The actual cake is your chiropractor’s hands, and too many don’t know how to use them, so they instead rely on chachkies that click and buzz and look impressive.
I don’t want to be misunderstood, these less than stellar adjusters aren’t breaking any laws, they’re not even breaking some ethereal chiropractic code that comes from a mysterious, well-adjusted chiropractic guru on a mountaintop. And if you’re happy with your high on style but low on adjustment skills experience good for you.
But what does it do?
I am fully confident in my ability to adjust patients, no matter what is presented to me. It’s a skill I’ve honed for twenty years with adjustments numbering in the hundreds of thousands. (Not an exaggeration, I’ve done the math.) So if you suspect your provider isn’t getting the job done, consider this: You get what you pay for, and if you’re paying for a great adjustment but getting a crappy one, there’s other chiropractic fish in the sea. Once you’ve had a great adjustment, it becomes easy to pick out what you’re looking for!
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